STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
