Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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