i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
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