sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
Randomize
