Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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