I puked a lego.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize