we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize
