No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize