with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
The ass gains better be worth it
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