somebody snuck up and got me drunk
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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