Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
He felt like a one man threesome
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
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