Grow some girl-balls and come out already
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
