you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
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