I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Randomize
