This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
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