Your tits are I can't wait for
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
