Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
