Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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