Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
