she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
