well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Randomize
