Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
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