....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize