I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
