Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
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