There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Randomize
