Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Randomize
