Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
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