i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Randomize
