Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
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