Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
