yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Randomize