Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
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