so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
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