She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
I have so many feelings about this burrito
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
Randomize