Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
