Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize