If i come over, it means nothing
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
