I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I am spending my child support on dildos
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
Randomize
