Only a mothe r could love this liver
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize