dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize