Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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