I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
Randomize
