tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Randomize
