marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Randomize
