It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
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