xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Randomize
