i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
You smell like a Billy Joel song
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
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