So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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