your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Randomize
