I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
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